Ranger Up Men's Master Chief Nutcracker T-Shirt
The Ranger Up Men's Master Chief Nutcracker T-Shirt represents the E-9, who is both nowhere and everywhere at the same time. They are always ready to bust your balls or crack your nuts in front of everyone. Jesus, Odin, and Captain by God America will witness you getting blistered like an Irish guy at the beach. We're pretty sure that there's an entire block of instruction at Staff NCO school on the proper cracking and shelling of every nut configuration. And no, officers, you aren't immune. That commission isn't a protective cup that guards against the emotional trauma of the E-8 wrath. Go ahead with that out of regs mustache.
That play about The Nutcracker Sweet should have featured an entire cast of Master Sergeants, First Sergeants, Senior Chief Petty Officers, and Senior Master Sergeants. But it didn't, so we made you these shirts. You're welcome.